Saturday, November 27, 2010
Something about Love
9:45 PM
Love,guess i knew nothing at all.
Somehow i misunderstood what love is..
Because it turns out that,
Love isn't what i thought it would be..
I thought loving someone would be simple..
But it turns out wrong..
Things went complicated..
Got myself into a mess..
Ruined my mood, my life...
I felt so not me!
Doesn't know whats wrong with me..
Can't seems to fix myself..
I don't like the present me anymore..
I need to be the original me again..
I need to find myself again..
I will never understand what love is afterall..
Because i thought i knew it..
But it turns out i was wrong..
So wrong about it..
I felt so stupid..
Went into r/s with a guy..
"I Love You" this 3 words,
How can i say this 3 words so easily to someone?
I thought i was serious about it..
But, no..
Soon after that i realise..
I don't really like/love him as much as i thought i would..
And soon i knew why..
I guess because i was really feeling the emptiness in my heart..
Guess i was alone for too long..
Needed someone to be there for me when i needed..
So i just went into the r/s without thinking about my own feeling towards him..
Without thinking about the consequences would be for him and for me..
Foolish of me..
Guess i never truly loved anyone..
And guess i don't deserved to be loved by anyone else..
I hurt not only you, but also myself..
Came to know what a person i am..
I sort of hate myself now..
And i just want to say, sorry..
We don't suit each other afterall..
I will never put hope on love again..
Never dared to say i love anyone anymore..
Because i don't what is love..
What love truly is..
Perhaps i just don't understand love..
Perhaps i wasn't meant to be loved or love someone..
Never go into a r/s just because you felt lonely, empty and needed someone there..
Go into a r/s only when you truly loved each other..
Otherwise it will only end in tragic..
Like mine..
